Why Coaching Is Still Misunderstood (And Why Coaching Skills Matter More Than Ever)

Coaching is one of the most valuable skills in modern organisations, yet coaching is still widely misunderstood. Many managers confuse coaching with mentoring, advice-giving or “fixing” problems. Others believe coaching is simply a softer version of leadership. These misunderstandings stop organisations from benefiting from real, effective workplace coaching and prevent leaders from using coaching skills confidently.

In this Article You will Learn –

• Most managers misunderstand what coaching is and how it differs from mentoring
• Poor understanding leads to ineffective coaching conversations
• When coaching skills are used properly, performance, confidence and decision-making improve dramatically

What Do We Mean by “Coaching”?

What is coaching?

Coaching is a structured, reflective conversation that helps someone think clearly, explore options and take ownership of their next steps.

Unlike mentoring or giving advice, leadership coaching is based on curiosity, listening and asking powerful questions.

Example:
Instead of saying:
“Here’s what I’d do…” (mentoring)
A coach asks:
“What options have you considered, and what feels like the best way forward for you?”

This small shift changes everything, and is the heart of coaching training and effective coaching skills.

Why This Matters

Common Challenges:

• People confuse coaching vs mentoring, assuming both are the same
• Managers default to solving or telling because it feels faster and easier
• Coaching feels slow, unfamiliar or awkward without proper training

Improvements When Done Well:

When coaching is understood and used correctly:

• Teams make stronger decisions
• Individuals take ownership rather than rely on managers
• Conversations become more honest and constructive
• Performance improves
• Confidence grows naturally
• A stronger coaching culture emerges

Key Principles

Principle 1 – Coaching Is About Thinking, Not Telling

The purpose of coaching is to support independent thinking. When managers use coaching instead of directing, they help people grow capability, not dependence.

Principle 2 – Questions Drive Insight

High-quality coaching questions lead to better decisions. They uncover assumptions, expand thinking and help people see situations differently.

Principle 3 – Space and Silence Are Essential Coaching Tools

Silence allows people to think deeply. Many leaders rush to fill it, but in coaching, silence often produces the breakthrough.

How to Get Started

1. Ask before you advise. Start each conversation with a curious question.
2. Pause. Give people time to think, don’t rescue them.
3. Shift ownership. Ask, “What do you want to do next?” rather than giving the next step.

These simple tools create more effective coaching conversations immediately.

Where Our Courses Fit In 

Our Management & Leadership Training programmes include practical coaching skills training to help managers understand what coaching really is and how to use it effectively at work. Through workshops, group coaching sessions and optional 1–1 coaching, we build confident, capable leaders who can embed coaching behaviour into everyday conversations.

Common FAQs 

• Is coaching the same as mentoring?
  No. Coaching is about helping someone think for themselves; mentoring shares experience or advice.
• Why is coaching important for managers?
  Coaching builds capability, confidence and independent thinking essential for modern leadership.
• Do I need formal training to coach well?
  Yes. Quality coaching training helps you understand the structure, mindset and techniques behind effective coaching.

Find out more here. 

Where do I go to find more information?

If you want confidence in coaching, whether it is coaching skills for management & leadership or more professional coaching skills, contact us on 0800 302 9344 or email us on info@targettrg.co.uk to choose the right option for your team.