Manager reflecting on a coaching conversation to correct coaching mistakes.

Coaching is now a core leadership skill, but that doesn’t mean it comes naturally. Many managers want to coach well, yet unintentionally fall into habits that block thinking, reduce ownership or create dependency. These coaching mistakes are common, understandable, and easy to fix, but only when managers know what to look for.
This guide highlights the most common coaching mistakes and shows you how to avoid them, so you can strengthen your coaching conversations immediately.

In This Article, You Will Learn

  • The most common coaching mistakes managers make
  • Why these mistakes block learning and ownership
  • What effective coaching actually looks like
  • How small changes improve performance and confidence
  • The key principles that prevent coaching from becoming “telling”
  • Simple techniques you can use right away

What Do We Mean by “Coaching Mistakes”?

Coaching mistakes are the habits that take a conversation away from genuine coaching and into something else, teaching, advising, directing, fixing, or rescuing.

These mistakes happen when managers:

  • Try to solve the problem
  • Ask leading questions
  • Rush the conversation
  • Take responsibility for the solution
  • Coach only when something goes wrong
  • Focus on details instead of thinking
  • Forget to follow up

These behaviours are common because coaching requires managers to step back, not step in, and that’s not always easy.

Recognising these mistakes is the first step in building confident, effective coaching skills.

Why This Matters

Common Challenges

Managers often fall into coaching mistakes because:

  • They confuse coaching with mentoring or training
  • They feel pressure to provide solutions
  • Coaching feels slow at first
  • They think coaching should produce quick answers
  • They don’t feel confident asking coaching questions
  • They find silence uncomfortable
  • They worry they’re “doing it wrong”

Improvements When Coaching Is Done Well

When managers avoid common coaching mistakes:

  • Employees take more ownership
  • Teams think for themselves
  • Dependency on the manager decreases
  • Workload reduces
  • Confidence grows
  • Behaviour change becomes consistent
  • Training is applied in real situations
  • The team becomes more independent and capable

Good coaching creates capability — poor coaching creates dependency.

Key Principles to Avoid Coaching Mistakes

Principle 1 – Coaching Is About Thinking, Not Telling

The moment you provide the answer, you’ve stopped coaching.
Coaching creates clarity, not quick fixes.

Principle 2 – Ask Questions That Don’t Lead

Avoid “Have you tried…” or “Couldn’t you just…?”.
These are instructions disguised as questions.

Principle 3 – Slow Down Before Stepping In

Rushing leads to surface-level solutions.
Coaching needs space, not speed.

Principle 4 – Focus on the Person, Not the Story

It’s not about the emails, meetings or drama, it’s about their thinking.

Principle 5 – The Coachee Owns the Actions

You guide the conversation; they choose the solution.
This is where accountability grows.

Principle 6 – Follow-Up Matters

Coaching without follow-up becomes a “nice chat” with no change.

Principle 7 – You Don’t Need to Be a Perfect Coach

Coaching is curiosity + listening + ownership.
Perfection is not required.

How to Get Started (and Avoid Coaching Mistakes Immediately)

  • Ask one coaching question before giving advice
  • Replace “Here’s what to do” with “What do you think is best?”
  • Pause for 5 seconds before responding
  • Notice when you’re about to solve the problem
  • Avoid leading or suggestive questions
  • Keep the conversation focused on the outcome, not the drama
  • End with: “What will you do next?”
  • Follow up later: “How did it go?”

Small shifts make a big difference.

Where Our Courses Fit In

In our Management & Leadership Training programmes we teach managers how to avoid these coaching mistakes and build real coaching confidence through:

  • Practical, simple frameworks
  • Real workplace coaching practice
  • Coaching demonstrations and live feedback

Our coaching courses provide deeper skills for managers who want to coach at a professional level.

And if you would like to look at our train the trainer courses because these are very different to coaching here is the link: https://targettrg.co.uk/courses/train-the-trainer-courses

This blended approach transforms coaching from something managers try to something they can do naturally and effectively.

Common FAQs

What is the most common coaching mistake?

Giving advice instead of asking questions.

What if someone just wants the answer?

Ask, “What have you considered?”, it builds ownership without overwhelming them.

Is coaching slower than telling?

At the start, yes. Long-term, coaching saves significant time.

How do I know if I’m coaching correctly?

If they are doing most of the thinking, you’re on the right track.

Can coaching improve performance issues?

Yes, coaching supports critical thinking, confidence and accountability.

Where Do I Go for More Information?

If you want to strengthen coaching skills, avoid common coaching mistakes, or build a coaching culture in your organisation, contact us:

email  info@targettrg.co.uk or 0800 302 9344