When you look at yourself, really look at yourself a good question to ask is “What I don’t want to write about” This is a beneficial exercise to do as a coach. To recognise some areas in yourself, you would least like your client to know about.

It is a really strange feeling to admit your faults, but as a coach, you do become used to sharing your innermost thoughts and feelings with peers. I always think you need to remind yourself of your vulnerability before a session with a client. Those feelings you carry are in everyone.

It is very useful to think about the areas you keep hidden, the imposter, the inner critic, thinking about the words that hold you back that trigger in a flash. Those moments you would prefer not to remember, but then the key is to flip it and recognise those are the times that made you who you are. We are all unique, but we must know ourselves and pay attention to the areas we prefer to not acknowledge as readily as our stronger areas, the areas we like about ourselves.

As a coach, we must remember the client, that immense feeling they feel when they walk into the room, and how much vulnerability they will be feeling. They will be holding so much that they would prefer to keep hidden. That is why it is so important that you the coach create a safe space, this is so important for the client to share their most secretive areas, the areas they prefer to keep hidden.

Through my practice, I think those first few minutes are vital to building the chemistry together, the rapport, confidentiality, the safe space to show vulnerability, the comfortable feeling you need in a coaching session.

Try the exercise, “What would I least like my clients to know about me”, really useful for you to remember those areas within yourself that you push to one side. They may be triggered in a session with a client, recognise these, and just how they make you feel. Think about the anxiety that your client may feel and the triggers that will happen for them. As a coach, you have to come alongside the client, sit in their shoes.

This is a simple blog to help you remember who you are and to think about the areas you prefer to not show, very useful but incredibly powerful and can create so much change when you face them.

Claire Moody is our head coach at Target Training, and you can read more about her here.  She delivers training on all personal development, coaching and numerous training the trainer courses.  Claire is author of Coaching Mindset, Coaching Journal and Supervision of Coaching all available from Amazon or our journal website jcrmjournals.com.