coaching blog - those words “hurry up”
When my mum used the words “Hurry up” to me, then the words “Get ready for school hurry up hurry up” Little did she know what patterns this would set up in me. Hurry up is just one of the five Kahler drivers but I relate very well to this one as I see it in everything that I do and one area I have to manage in myself especially when coaching.
I always work fast. I love juggling lots of tasks to work with, then complain about how much time I don’t have. Then when I get the clear time what stress this can cause for me? Such a strange pattern. When we tell our children to hurry up what we fail to do is to say when not to hurry up, this can cause such an imbalance.
There are five drivers I am just focusing on this one as it resonates with me in everything I do. I always have to consider this when I am coaching, and I have had to learn to deal with this in my coaching sessions. Easy now but at first quite hard to separate my drivers and me from the coachees.
Years ago, I would in my head be continually watching the clock, tapping my fingers or feet if things were not moving quickly. I like to work quickly on tasks; this is all part of my makeup. Have you ever thought what your drivers are and how you deal with them and how to contain them? Think about yourself, or your staff and your coachees, are they consciously aware of their drivers. The patterns they may have and how they may be seen?
I used to use and hear the words “What a waste of a day” I don’t like lots of thinking time, I like to be active all day. I have struggled to relax in the past because I am all about speed efficiency because of those words “Hurry up”. Fantastic reflecting on you and the five drivers and how others may see this and why you are the way you are, the key, it is all about managing them.
In a coaching room, I must hold myself back when I feel the excitement from one of my coachees when they say something that triggers my instinct that they have this driver. It usually creates the picture of the story about the hare and the tortoise. Just reflect on that one for a second and recognise in yourself what jumps out in you? Is this in you or do you see it in one of your staff? Think about what is happening at the moment when you recognise this and what you can (if you choose to) do about it. Understanding the different stress areas from this driver is essential as with all the other Kahler drivers.
Claire Moody is our head coach at Target Training, and you can read more about her here. She delivers training on coaching for managers courses, and you can learn more about these courses here and see dates here.